Is someone you know in an abusive relationship?


We recognise that there is no simple way to know whether someone you know is experiencing abuse, but there are signs that you can look out for. They may be small at first, but over time they may become more obvious. Here are some examples of changes in behaviour that may occur:

• Changes in clothing and hairstyle

• Isolation and withdrawal from friends and family

• Changes in use of social networking sites – such as posting fewer updates, removing photos or deleting friends

• Cancelling plans or making excuses not to spend time with friends

• Clock watching

• Constantly apologising for a person’s behaviour

• Depression or anxiety, less happy than they used to be, changes in behaviours

• Inappropriate clothing for the time of year or environment

What can you do?

If you know or suspect a family member, friend, or work colleague is experiencing domestic violence and abuse, it may be very difficult to know what to do. One step is to call the team at Calan DVS as we can provide specialist support services, designed to support individuals and families to stay safe. 

Your first instinct may be that you want to protect your friend or family member, but intervening can be dangerous for both you and them. Of course, this does not mean you should ignore it – there are things you can do to help make them and their family safer.

If your friend is open with you and acknowledging the abuse, this is a positive sign and an indication that they trust you. Try to keep in touch with them so that they don’t become more isolated which is often the danger in an abusive situation.

Encourage your friend or family member to seek professional help and prioritise their safety at all times.

Try not to be impatient or judgemental and keep the lines of communication open at all times.

You will be a lifeline to your friend or family member.

However, the decision to leave the relationship has to ultimately come from them and can sometimes take several attempts before they leave the relationship for good.

Try to remind them that domestic violence and abuse is always the fault of the abuser.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse, Calan provides specialist support services, designed to support individuals and families to stay safe.  Please contact one of our specialist support teams on one of the below numbers:

Ammanford: 01269 597474

Brecon: 01874 625146

Bridgend: 01656 766139

NeathPT: 01639 633580

Radnor: 01597 824655

If you witness an assault you can call the Police on 999.

If you have experienced domestic abuse, sexual violence and/or violence against women, or are worried about a friend or relative who is experiencing any form of violence or abuse, you can also contact the Live Fear Free helpline, it’s free, and available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Call: 0808 80 10 800